Sunday, December 22, 2013


Ok, hopefully you went through the tedious “Reality Check” from my last post. I’m sorry if it was hard to see, but it is necessary to see and admit what is going on. Spending more than you make can become an addiction, and is sometimes difficult to face. The first step of the 12 step program for recovering addicts is to “Admit you are powerless over your addiction.” It is the first step to freedom. Maybe you’re not that bad, but it was still helpful to get some refining in your ideas of where your money has been disappearing to.

Now, let’s do another activity. I don’t want you to not think of where you are “at” for a moment, and instead think of where you would like to be, and dream a bit and perhaps even start the foundation for setting some goals. Here we go:

CLOSE YOUR EYES...Hehe, ok, so you can’t actually close your eyes and do this at the same time. Pretend to close your eyes. Really think, or meditate on these thoughts.

Think back to when you were about 8 years old, around 3rd grade. Hopefully you can picture your class mates, who was your teacher? What did your siblings look like at that age? What kinds of things did you play at recess? Who was your best friend?
(Picture of Disney’s Recess on ABC)

Keep thinking about it, but I want to tell you why I pick this age. This was the age between complete innocence, and just on the brink of starting to understand the world around you more. You probably had an IDEA of what the world was all about. I doubt there were many limitations to you, as this was still an age of imagination; the possibilities of life as a grown-up were endless!! You probably played those things out on the playground, between games of tag, wall-ball, four square, and perhaps Mario Brothers, or Ninja Turtles. You probably had an idea of what KIND of adult you wanted to be, and more than likely wanted to be an astronaut or president or teacher when you grew up…

Now I want you to think further on the KIND of adult you wanted to be, not so much what you wanted to BE for a job as an adult. What KIND. I know I thought I would be adventurous, not boring like so many adults I saw. I wanted to be full of energy; I didn’t give thoughts to finances, obligations, responsibilities. I was going to be a parent like no other; my kids would think I was the coolest!! Think on these things. I will stop suggesting, because I want to give you the chance to think of your own, and if it helps, write them down.

Now let’s take it just a bit further. If time, money, or education didn’t matter, what would you do with yourself? I think all of us think like Bill Murray in Ground Hog’s Day, where we have silly petty things we would get out of our systems first, but then with this question, you get to go deeper in the endless time and money, and you realize you can truly do anything you want (except killing ourselves over and over again like he did in the movie)!! What did his character finally do? He learned to play piano, and carve ice sculptures. He learned about people, and helped people. He worked on his people skills and more. Think about this. Why do we like this kind of a movie so much (or despise it, because we really want more time so badly we can taste it)? What things have you always wanted to learn? What hobbies have you wanted to do? What adventures have you wanted to take? But even more, what kind of parent do you want to be? What kind of marriage do you want to have? What kind of person do you wish you were?

Alright, here is the hard part to these questions:

(Picture from Disney’ Recess on ABC)

First, I want you to know that I’m not saying, go buy that expensive car you always wanted, or sporadically go on that dream vacation to Greece without planning, or jump over 50 cars with a motorcycle.
What I am saying is that there are so many things you can still accomplish with your life. Dave Ramsey says, “There is hope, if you are sucking air.” You are not limited by the things that have or have not happened in your past. You can make things happen!! You can have a fiery marriage that others are jealous of. You can be an intentional parent that your kids want to bring their friends home to. You can plan that Hawaiian vacation.
There are things that tie us down though. Maybe for you, it’s because you are swimming in debt and don’t know how you will EVER get out of it. Maybe you and your spouse only communicate to have intense discussions about the bills. Maybe you feel like life is completely unfair, and all you’ve been able to do is be reactive to the lemons it has thrown your way.
I want you to really allow yourself to reflect on the things you want. And start thinking of the ways-even if they’re completely crazy, you never know, sometimes those end up being the best ideas-that you might be able to start working towards those things.

I’m going to stop here for now, but will be back with more soon. In the meantime, I pray that you will be able to start getting an understanding of who you are now, and not give up hope. Instead think of who you want to be, and know that you can get there, with a little time and work.
  Make it a blessed day!!

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